How Faith Changed My Perspective on Pain, Purpose, and Perseverance

A year ago, I wrote a poem titled Why Not Me? At the time, the words flowed from a place of deep reflection and unanswered questions. I had spent years carrying the weight of loss, disappointment, childhood wounds, and seasons that seemed far more difficult than they should have been. It felt as though every time I overcame one obstacle, another was waiting around the corner.

For a long time, I found myself asking God the same question:

“Why me?”

Why did I have to endure so much pain?

Why did I have to experience loss?

Why did life seem harder than it appeared to be for others?

These questions are not uncommon. Many of us ask them when we find ourselves walking through valleys we never asked to enter. When we are hurting, it is natural to wonder why God would allow certain things to happen.

When I wrote this poem, I was beginning to see something I had overlooked for years. As I reflected on my childhood, my struggles, and the many battles I had fought, I realized that none of those experiences had been wasted. What felt like burdens had actually become building blocks. Every hardship had shaped my character. Every disappointment had strengthened my faith. Every tear had taught me to depend on God in ways I never would have otherwise.

The little girl who once needed protection grew into a woman who learned how to lean on God for strength.

The widow who questioned her future learned that God still had purpose for her life.

The woman who felt abandoned discovered she had never truly been alone.

Looking back, I can see God’s hand in places where I once only saw pain.

Today, life is not perfect. Challenges still come. Difficult seasons still arise. There are moments when I still feel overwhelmed by circumstances I cannot control. The difference is that my response has changed.

A year ago, I was still wrestling with the question.

Today, I have learned to pray my way through it.

Instead of immediately asking, “Why me?” I find myself asking God, “What are You teaching me through this?” Instead of focusing on the burden, I focus on the One carrying me through it.

The shift from “Why me?” to “Why not me?” is not about welcoming suffering or pretending pain doesn’t hurt. It is about understanding that trials are often the tools God uses to refine us, strengthen us, and prepare us for greater purpose.

I no longer see my story as evidence that God has forgotten me.

I see it as evidence that He trusted me enough to walk through the fire and emerge stronger.

The same God who sustained me through childhood struggles, grief, disappointments, and uncertainty is the same God who continues to sustain me today.

My circumstances have not always changed, but my perspective has.

That is what growth looks like.

Growth is not the absence of struggle. Growth is learning to trust God in the middle of it.

As I reread this poem a year later, I no longer hear a woman questioning God’s goodness. I hear a woman beginning to recognize God’s faithfulness.

And now, when challenges arise, I no longer ask, “Why me?”

With faith, surrender, and confidence in God’s plan, I ask,

“Why not me?”

Because if God has brought me through every trial before, He will carry me through whatever comes next.

You can read the poem 👇🏾 👇🏾

Why Not You?